ORIGINALLY INTENDED AS A RIDE

By Ben Greenman

from forthcoming collection, as yet untitled

Sue Jenkins has learned from Greta Yang that a woman down the block has been subjected to six months’ ostracism for insulting her own mother during a holiday dinner. In a conversation conducted in the middle of the street, a situation made possible a result of the total absence of traffic resulting from the scheduling of the biannual block party—it featured, as usual, grilled hamburgers and hot dogs, homemade cookies and cakes, a few basic carnival games, an inflatable castle in which the block’s youngest residents were invited to jump, and a pony that was originally intended as a ride but which evinced enough irritability that it was instead paraded up and down the street without any children on its back—Yang informed Jenkins that the unnamed neighbor had for years hosted a monthly dinner for her parents, siblings, and assorted other family members. Most went well, or well enough. But in late summer, an otherwise civil dinner took a turn for the worse when the host accused her mother of harboring resentment over the host family’s use of of their vacation home upstate. “Based on what Dorrie Venable said,” said Greta Yang, “it sounds like the mother made a series of comments about how the other sister always invited the parents to their vacation home while this one didn’t. And this sister took offense because the parents were at her house already, right? So the woman turns to her mother and says something horrible.” Sue Jenkins, according to others present for the conversation, placed a hand on Greta Yang’s forearm and wondered aloud about the precise nature of the insult. Greta Yang shook her head. “I don’t know,” she said, “and I don’t think Dorrie does either. She heard about it from Isabel Rodriguez, who heard about it from Sue D’Elia.” At this, Sue Jenkins snorted derisively. “Not surprised,” she said. She had always believed, she told Greta Yang that gossip was a pollutant, and she had long held the opinion, she told Greta Yang, that Sue D’Elia “produced more hazardous waste than anyone else around.” Looking around quickly and dropping her voice, but still speaking loudly enough for the others present to hear, she added that she had heard that Sue D’Elia’s husband Bradley was no longer living at home, and that he preferred to spend his nights with his younger girlfriend, but noted that news of that sort was exactly the kind of thing she would never repeat. She didn't consider herself that kind of person, she told Greta Yang. The pony passed by at that moment, and something about its appearance ended the conversation. The two Sues, who live around the corner from one another, have met on occasion but have not had any real interaction that extended beyond pleasantries, and the chances of that now seem remoter than ever.