…AND WOULD SAY NO MORE

By Ben Greenman

from forthcoming collection, as yet untitled

This year, we have seen the rate of confounded desire increase by ten or fifteen percent in the city, a rate that exceeds that of the country at large. This statistic, put forth by a comprehensive study conducted by the University of Hartsfield, describes frustration of all types, not just romantic, but creative, financial, physical, and spiritual, not to mention the pique associated with smaller and more discrete goals such as opening a difficult jar or waiting too long to be served at a restaurant. All of these have proliferated to the point where they have become the ground and the figures rising up to distinguish themselves in relief are nowhere to be found. The indications point to a year of frustration more remarkable than any in the past. During the previous century, if records were made, they were not published, and while certain years, particularly those caught up in war, saw a high incidence of vexation, they also featured  great satisfaction and contentedness. Now our lives are marked primarily by pent-up energies and self-inflicted tribulation. “I feel it myself,” said Beverly Cronin, one of the authors of the Hartsfield study and thus someone who has looked into the matter more than most. “I’ll give you an example. I know a man, have known him for years as a colleague. I’ve also had a more personal interest in him, and over time it became clear that he had an interest in me, and we’ve circled the issue, with the thought that we might decide to do something about it. There were stretches of promise, and they were very exciting. In this last year, though, the prospect of anything happening has become quite remote. The window feels as if it’s closing, or has already closed. I don’t blame myself and I certainly don’t blame him, since as best as I can tell from the available data it’s a global phenomenon. Yesterday I got a paper cut. Tough season.” Cronin’s co-author, Bryan Amato, then entered the room, at which point Cronin covered her mouth and would say no more.