By Ben Greenman
from forthcoming collection, as yet untitled
An unusual scene transpired yesterday at Three Points Elementary School, a first-grader twice struggling violently with the name tag tacked beneath his cubbyhole and finally tearing it away with a wild outburst of profanity. The perpetrator was Kevin, six, who was taken into the hall by the teacher and charged with disruptive behavior. He explained that he had become frustrated by the cubby system, which he found “stupid” and “annoying,” an arrangement that “[made] people feel like babies,” and vowed that if the name tag was restored he would rip it down again and again utter “wrong words.” This was not the first offense for Kevin, who earlier in the year approached a teacher on the street and asked her what she was doing out of school, and who last year attempted to organize all the other kindergarteners around demands of a four-day school week. He was remanded for inquiries as to his political philosophy and general disregard for authority.
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